Conquering Workflows & Systems For Bookkeepers & Accountants | with Alyssa Lang (Workflow Queen)

How to Create an Aligned Business and Life with Ashley Strong Smith

• Alyssa Lang • Season 1 • Episode 72

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Alyssa Lang interviews Ashley Strong Smith, Intentional Living Coach, Author + Host of Living an Intentional Life Podcast. Alyssa and Ashley dive deep into how to align with yourself, your business and your friends and family without burning out and how to live an intentional life.

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • How to align with what you want in business, life and for friends and family
  • How to pivot when life takes you down different paths and allow it to unfold in front of you
  • What practical steps you should be taking to know that you’re living in your truth
  • Why doing the internal work is one of the most important things you can do for yourself

About our guest:

Ashley Strong Smith has spent the past 15 years living in expansive inquisitiveness. Eagerly asking herself lives deepest questions, intentionally + courageously creating the space to live the very honest, vulnerable, raw, life-enhancing answers.

Ultimately bringing her to a deep place of passion and purpose, intentionality and authenticity, vulnerability and courage. Finding her place in this world, where she finally feels she truly belongs.

She is a multi-passionate woman - An entrepreneur holding space for three expressions (Intentional Living Coach, Author + Host of Living an Intentional Life Podcast), a fire-wife to a South African immigrant who she met in Tanzania, a mom to a four year-old radiant soul + 2 big puppies + 2 cats, a certified yoga instructor, a mountain-dweller, an adventure seeker, a connector and traveler of this world - living in 4 countries, visiting another 10, and an additional 15 States.

She is a pursuer of dreams writing her first book, “From Seed to Soar : A guide to connect to your heart, nurture your dreams and cultivate inner belonging.” Mostly, she is an insanely curious soul letting the parameters of this very curiosity, know no limits.

After-all, she believes we are limitless.

Connect with Ashley Strong Smith:

Follow her on Instagram: www.instagram.com/ashleystrongsmith_

Listen to her Living an Intentional Life Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/living-an-intentional-life-podcast/id1648573252

Resources mentioned in this episode:

💻 5 steps to discover your dreams FREE masterclass 📖 Creating a Heart-Centered Foundation Workbook

📚 The Code of the Extraordinary Mind by Vishen Lakhiani

Thanks for listening. If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device and post it to your Instagram stories and tag me, @workflowqueen

For more information about the Conquering Workflows & Systems for Bookkeepers & Accountants Podcast or interest in our programs or mentoring visit our resources below:

Visit our website: workflowqueen.com

Check out our courses: workflowqueen.com/courses

Follow the Blog: workflowqueen.com/blog

Connect on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/alyssa-lang-wq

Connect on Instagram: instagram.com/workflowqueen

Connect on Facebook: Facebook.com/workflowqueen

Podcast Publishing Tools we use:

Wow. I just finished up recording this episode and I think you guys are going to absolutely love this guest I'm bringing on today. Her name is Ashley Strong Smith. I actually met her here in my city, which is lake Arrowhead, California at a women's business meetup group. And she's literally so amazing and she's just so passionate about what she does and today's episode, we're going to dive really deep. We're not just going to talk about the business stuff, guys. We're actually going to talk about things that we need to internally focus on for ourselves to be really aligning ourselves with our lives and really where we want to go and what that actually looks like for us. So in today's episode, we're going to be talking about how to really fill your own cup and really just allow yourself to let the world unfold in front of you. And how to navigate as things happen and things change and just knowing and recognizing that everything's going to be okay. We're going to talk about how to align yourself with your wants and needs that you actually need, not just in the business, but also for yourself personally. And she's going to share a lot of practical steps in knowing and making sure that you're living in your honest, full truth. So today's episode, I think you're absolutely gonna love it and make sure that you have a pen and paper because she's got some really great steps and tricks and things that you guys can use to get yourself fully aligned with where you actually want to be in life. Hey everyone, and welcome back to yet another episode of the conquering workflows and systems for bookkeepers and accounts podcast with your host here, Alyssa Lang. I'm so excited because I actually get to bring someone on that I have met personally in real life. And it's just so interesting how we met. And I just can't wait for the conversation that's about to happen today, but. Funny story about our lovely guests today. A friend of mine um, which I know that most of you have, if you're in my program, you've met my friend, Nicole. She's done some sessions for you guys virtually on yoga and all the fun things. One day she was like, Hey, I'm going to go to this like mountain, like women's like group. It's like women and like entrepreneurs. And it's on the mountain up here in Lake Arrowhead. And I was like, I'll go. Sure. Yeah, I'll go. So I showed up with her and like, I had a really good time and it was just like, really interesting to meet other women where I live because we live very remotely that are also in entrepreneurship, because as most of you know, it is quite a lonely road. And so it was really cool. And then me and Ashley kind of hit it off. And then the second time around we were talking about some amazing, cool things that she's doing. So I thought she was the most perfect guest to be bringing on about a topic that I think for me is very near and dear to my heart, which I know a lot of our listeners want to talk about strategy, but really it's about the deep work. So we're about to get deep. So welcome to the show, Ashley. So feel free to introduce yourself and tell everyone about all your amazing. Oh, I really just first want to say thank you. Such a beautiful opportunity and experience to connect in this way. I think when there is an intentional conversation that happens, there is so much depth that is felt and covered and rawness and realness. And it is like what I geek out about. So I'm just really grateful. Thank you for the invitation. Who am I? All the fun things. I think more so than anything, I just feel like a very blessed soul. I feel like I live a life that is beyond my wildest dreams. And it is the result of a lot of intentional, incremental, small decisions. I met my husband when I was teaching English in Tanzania on a small Island called Mafia Island, who I just literally, he said, hello. And I was That was the end of that. And so we've been married now and together for 13 years, did cross continent, immigrated him here. We have an almost five year old daughter who is Hilarious. Like legitimately hilarious. And I just think it is the funniest thing to watch this little human be so much of herself. We've got a little bit of a zoo here, so I'm sure at some point animal will jump up. We've got two dogs and a cat. And who I am really from how I interconnect with the world outside of myself and family is, as I mentioned, I feel like I live a life beyond my wildest dreams, like. The younger version of me never thought I was smart enough or pretty enough or good enough or rich enough or whatever the enough story was that I never thought that I would have the opportunity to live out these feelings that were in me. And for so long, I had really strong feelings have always been really connected. I'm a cancer, so I'm super connected to my emotions. But for so many years, I didn't make sense to myself. Then I went through the shoulds and the supposed tos of lives. I went to college. I got my nine to five right afterwards. Funny story. I don't know if you know this, but I was actually an accounting major for one semester. What? I cried, girl. I cried. I cried my way through every single exam because I'm like, I don't get this. It doesn't make sense in my head. Yep. And I'm like, is this normal? And I was so grateful. I had a guidance counselor that I went to and I just broke down. I'm like, am I like, I'm like, am I just like, am I not smart enough? You know, but really it just wasn't in my being, you know, but it was really funny. But through a lot of exploration, pieces of me started to make more sense. In college, I started as an accounting major that didn't make sense. I went to a teaching major that felt a little more aligned, but it felt really pigeonholed because as I started going through it, I realized you only get a teaching credential to teach in a classroom with a very specific curriculum, I'm assuming. Exactly. And so, yeah, exactly. So I share this because it's a lot of little steps that enable our full selves to really start to shine through that. The big connection point was I actually had made the decision. I'm just going to focus on taking my GE courses, like these general education classes. And I took an Africana studies course. So like an African history course, and I Was head over heels. I was like, I need to know everything because what had started to happen. Like I grew up. With music and a lot of reggae music, my friends at school were in a really popular band for such a young age. I would always go tour with them. And so I got to know a lot of reggae artists and what I started to realize what this, this reggae music that I had grown up to in African history, there was such a deep correlation. And so it fascinated me. And so that kind of really was the foundation of me starting to understand these pieces of myself. So I wound up minoring in Africana studies. I majored in business marketing because I wanted, I knew I was going to work at the time I wanted to work for a nonprofit or like a human. So I'm like that way I can fuel both sides of my like curiosity, but ultimately what it brought me to was I had worked for the PBS, the like local PBS station right outside of college and loved it. And. I outgrew it and it became really loud. Like something just felt like it was missing. And so I went, I'm really connected to this part of my story right now, cause I'm actually writing my first book. And my story is the book is not an autobiography, but my story is the inspiration. I've like pulled apart what I've done. But really what that like piece that was missing was I went into a lot of exploration. A lot of personal exploration and what it ultimately did was reconnected me back when I was in college. I wanted to do the Peace Corps more than anything. I had gone to all the meetings. I had paperwork in hand and then I found out it was a 27 month commitment and I totally chickened out at the time. But that burning desire was still in me. And so I found a program that was way smaller. It was a three month program. And at the time my, I applied for the program, I got accepted. My job was remarkable. They gave me a sabbatical at work, which I never in my life thought that was going to happen. And so I got to live out. a dream and go teach English in Africa. Um, I'd always wanted to like live on the African continent and that really became the catalyst and the catapult for me just making sense to myself. And what happened there was for the first time in my life, I got to know myself outside of the parameters that typically in the United States and in our lives define us, like what our job is, who our friends are, the type of car that we drive, what our clothes are, like how we present ourselves, all of these things that, yes, they are self expression, but they do become this definition of worth. And when all of that is removed, we start like what it does, or at least what it did for me was it opened up the space to start to look at what is the worth within me. When everything is removed, who is this soul that is moving through this world? And that space and time really allowed me to connect with that. And now it's my mission and purpose to do that for as many women as I possibly can without them having to do something drastic like going and teaching English in Africa for three months and living in a local village and taking bucket showers. Like, Without having to do that drastic big component, how do we do that in our very real lives by just making these small intentional actions? Yes. I love that. And I love the story. I haven't even had the chance to hear it from you. So it's actually really cool to now hear it. And it's so funny because we're recording. We're literally in the same city. It's so weird to me because. I'm so used to talking to people all over the world at this point. And I'm like, it's so funny when we're like literally probably right down the street from each other. And I just love hearing this story because I love hearing people's origins. And I think everybody else to the listeners as well is that it's so interesting to see. And one thing that I wrote down that I really wanted to kind of reconnect back to was What it sounded like to me was that you allowed whatever life was unfolding in front of you. You didn't have a predetermined path. You might have one point thought you might have needed a certain path, but you allowed life to kind of direct you in whatever direction it kind of took you. Which is interesting because it really resonates with me because here at Workflow Queen, this is now my third company. This company would not have existed if I didn't have my first company. First business and gone through my own struggles with running, trying to build my own team, build my own systems from my accounting firm, like do all these different things. And. I only started this company literally to help other accounting firms. Like I used to just do like a sauna setups. I no longer do like setups anymore, but at that time I just did as an extension of the company. And then it became so many people were like, Alyssa, like we need support. I was like, this is not scalable. I cannot be doing all these setups I have to create. And that's when the programs came. And now we're at this point, it's just so funny how. If I would have resisted that, oh, that's not my path. No, that's not where I'm supposed to go. This would have never been created. And the third would have never been created. And life would have never become, I would have probably never even moved to Arrowhead. Like there's so many, it's so interesting to me. So I am a firm believer. Just like you, that allow life to like take its steps even though it's really scary to go unfold in whatever direction it's going to go into. So that leads me into my first question. For anybody who, we're going to get super deep, I already know it, on this call. I'm just super pumped about it. How do you have the conversation with someone to help them to understand where the fine line between, selfishly acting versus allowing it to be exactly what it is? Like where it takes you, you know what I mean? Yeah. I, no, one's asked that question before, and I love the way that you phrased it. There's a few things that I really felt when you were sharing is all too often. We want to know, like, we want to know everything. If I, if I do a, is B C D E F G H I all going to work out, you know, but the truth is. We will never know even what B is if we don't take the single step to start with a, and so the, like the thing that I've learned, even in the work that I've done and how I share it with women when I launched my coaching business, I used to call it courage coaching because it takes so much courage. To listen to those steps, to trust life, to like, you know, to courageously take a step at a time. And though courage can really sometimes just get honed in, in a category of like doing something big, like jumping out of a plane or moving to Africa. But the truth is like every single one of us are innately courageous within us because each and every single one of us can take one step. It's in all of us. So the first thing that I like Sharon say is like, just focus on what the next step is, because just as you take one step, how to take the next step will reveal itself, it will get you to point B. just as you just shared with your three companies. So point B was maybe company two, but I'm sure there was a lot of small points in there. Then once you get to point B, you just have to take one more step to point C and so much is revealed. So we can, the way that I support women and that I truly believe in understanding how do we even take that first step is something that I'm actually so grateful. I get to share it with your audience on a really intimate level is something that I call creating a heart center foundation. And your question girl is such a beautiful confirmation of why I geek out about this concept so much. So what creating a heart centered foundation is ultimately understanding who are you when no one is looking. Who is this soul that is like moving you through this world? Some people call it their intuition. Some people call it their inner voice. Like people call it different things. And so how to find this is answering these questions. What are your values? So what are these qualities about life that like you appreciate or enjoy or like are attracted to? What do you value about life? So these are your experiences. Think of these as like an act of doing something. What do you love? Like, what are those things that when you do it, you just feel that warmth, that like silly getting warmth inside. What are you curious about? So what are these things that when someone says something that antenna goes up and you're like, Oh, That sounds really cool. I want to know more about that. Or okay. What brings you joy? So what are these things that like fill up your cup? Yeah. That can be interchangeable with like, what inspires you? So what are these things that ultimately motivate you? And the last question in this is what does success mean to you? And I know that that question is so different. From the previous ones, but why it's so important is that question of what does success mean to you? It is that bridging of the gap of why are you doing what you're doing? Why do you want, like, why are you even wanting to make that first step to get to point a, we've got to understand ourselves to then build that trust with ourselves to be able to slowly take those steps. I love that. I love all the questions because I'm gonna make sure we write all those down because those are great. One thing that hits as you were like talking about it is one, we're always going to shift towards the business because obviously our listeners are business owners. So I figured we would eventually get to that conversation, but you kind of easily segue segue into that next conversation. Um, but one thing that you kind of talked about was aligning like what does that success mean to you? And I think this goes to like one. It's so important We teach the why in one of my programs and we talk about like the deep internal why of why? You're doing what you're doing. What do they call it? The seven layers of why like always asking yourself? Well, why like but why do you want? Oh, I want to make money, but why do you want to make money? Why do you want it? Oh, because I want my car. But why do you want the car? Like what do you really want? Because you need to get deep to understand so you can really connect with what you do and your purpose with what we're building every single day. And so one of the things that like, literally this just happened like three days ago. One of our students, so my group coaching program, breakthrough, which any of the listeners here who's breakthrough students, Ashley will actually be doing a session pretty soon for y'all. So I can't wait for her to be doing a private session for you guys. But in that program, one of the, a woman I met in the bathroom a couple of years ago at a place I was speaking in Vegas. And she was telling me about her business and where it's at and just the frustration and just wanting to be out of it. And we were talking about like, it's possible. Yeah. You know, the strategy. The systems, the team, the people, but then there's the also like, but what are you working for? Like, what are you actually going towards? The other day, like three days ago, I like literally saw this and I bawled and she was like, the day is finally here. I don't even know what to do with myself. I feel like I literally need an SOP. just to like know how to like function with not being in the weeds. My team is running the show. Clients are happy. I just took Memorial Day weekend off and it's been so beautiful and it's so cool. But her deep why was like, I can't keep doing this. I want to live my life to its absolute fullest. So therefore how can I get support? So yeah, part of that support was working with us. But the other part of that was I saw her do so much work. And the, the, just the frustration she had, the one on one calls, the, her sharing in communities, and I'm just so beyond proud of her. But I just wanted to share that story mostly because if she didn't connect to what she really desired and what she needed for her future, she would have never put in the work. And I think it's literally the most important thing is the mindset and the inner foundation before you can build anything on top of it. I mean, I'm geeking out and like snapping for this woman, whoever, right. She's beautiful. I love her. Yes. Yes. Yes. And you shared some So beautifully, a few things. One, you need to know your why, because that becomes your equilibrium. That becomes your spine. It's like, I always think of it. Do you remember those toys that you had as a kid where there was a weight on the bottom and if you pushed it, it would pop back up. And it's like, if you're think of the weight as your equilibrium, there's going to be life happens. We're in a human experience. There's going to be times where you're little, I don't know what they're called. You're a little pendulum thing. I know what you're talking about. Yeah. Is going to get knocked down, you know, but if you've got a really strong equilibrium, you are going to come back. And what starts to happen is so beautiful is you grow and expand. So not only are you going to come back to your equilibrium, but it's going to get even more connected. Even more full, even more intentional because you've done the work. The other thing that I really wanted to highlight about what you shared in that woman's story is small, intentional action. Every single day compounds. It's my mantra in life right now, compounds to major change. Transformation and the realization of your dreams. Had she not taken that first step, I think you said you had a conversation in a bathroom. Had she not had that conversation in the bathroom? That was her point. A, she would not be at her point Z, her definition of success today, and that two years, it didn't just happen overnight. For the last two years, she has been putting in so much small Work that then layered to this major life transformation and realization of her dreams. And so I just share that and highlight it for the women listening, because sometimes it's so it's, we go into analysis paralysis when we're like, okay, I know, I know what I want. So how do I even get there? And it's like, yes, you do need to know where you're driving your car, but let's get real on a road trip. Are you going to map out exactly where you're going to stop and get a coffee and to go to the bathroom. Th Yeah. I love that. I love the connection between the car ride because I'm like really big on analogies that make sense for people. And it does because you're right. Like, I mean, I could also have drank a whole water bottle right before I leave and like, we never know where we're going to be, but then I hoped I didn't have to go into like four hours later. So I really love that analogy because I think it's going to really connect with like the audience. And one thing that you kind of brought up was about taking a small impactful steps. It's same in business, same in personal. And I. People. So my best friend, her name is Brooke Swan, and I'm just obsessed with her. She's one of our coaches. So you'll probably meet her in the guest expert session. She's just an incredible human being. One thing that she always says to everyone is that your business is a connection of you as a human. So if your life is chaotic, most likely your business is going to be chaotic as well. But the more you can detach yourself and let your business become its own baby, the more It now no longer has to run off the emotions of you. And I always thought that that really resonated with me. Like every time she brings it up, I'm always like, yeah, cause I have to recognize that in so many different ways. But it's the same with like life. Like if I need to work on myself in order to grow my business. And if I can't serve me, I'll give you a great example. I just hired a personal assistant. And I know I was talking about this at our, our in person women's thing. I was like, I'm so excited. She's just starting. She's been with me for like two weeks. And that was to me, a very. It sounds like a selfish role, but in at first it felt like that for myself because she's not here to generate revenue. She's not here to serve my clients, my students, or anyone. She's genuinely here for me. So I was running through my own, you know, imposter syndrome and all the things that came up for me and being like, I'm not worth it. I'm not enough. You know how that goes. But anyways, it was like one little tiny thing, but just having the awareness and knowing. I can't do this alone anymore. So I can really drive these things forward is a beautiful moment. And I think that that's where you started with your point A is what it sounds like, where it's really creating that awareness. Yeah around what's happening and what do you want and then from there the clarity comes and then it's like Little things you don't have to try to you know, build. What does it build room in the day in a day? Is that what they say? Yeah, well and it's and it's so true and I think that's something like i'm so deeply passionate about is like why intentional living Is such a like high vibrational thing to me Because I used to think and I even think my younger self I think of the woman before who was just in college trying to figure her All of this vessel and being in life out is, I think sometimes it's like we think that we have to do these massive, massive things in a really, really short amount of time. And it's not fair. It's not realistic to us as human beings because life is so dynamic. And I know Most of us are operating, especially the business owners in this space at a really full capacity. So just give yourself the grace, create, it's like, know what that dream is or what that goal is, but give yourself the permission to break it down. I like geek out about it. I'm like, you've got your goal. What needs to happen? In the year, what needs to happen each quarter? What needs to happen monthly? What needs to happen weekly? What needs to happen daily? Like, what do you need to do to get there? Because you want it there, but like, make it work for you. Yeah. I love that. And so for any of the listeners here, cause I know that this is something that they really struggle with just like knowing and understanding this industry is we're not known to be a type of to be courageous. Like in all actuality, this is a matter of fact, IRS compliance, you know, people who are Canadian, they have their own compliance, like everybody's got their own, we're very much like data, data, data, give me answers, black and white, that's it. And so I think from a lot of people here who really struggle with how do I actually step into, it's okay if the path. Kind of veers off because we like strategy. We like plans. We like structure. If this was you and you were talking to that person right now and having that conversation, they said, I'm really struggling with how to own being courageous and taking that step and doing these things. What would you say to them? Oh, I love that question. I mean, immediately I go back to what I just shared the questions of creating a heart centered foundation, like be aware of these things that move your soul. The like, follow up to that. And the next thing that I would like say to her is how do we start to, so I'm going to, I'm going to like break it down. So what I would honestly do, let's check in with where you're at in your life right now. Just a brain dump. First thought, best thought, anything that is present, where are you at in your life right now? From that point, what I would then do is have her look at what in your life that is present and lived out. What is expansive? So like, what is filling up your cup? What is making your heart sing? Like what is inspiring you? And then what is exhaustive or like depleting? So what is taking away? Like, what are these things that are just taking time and energy and pulling you away from your truth? From there, in addition to knowing the heart centered foundation. So answering the questions, value, love, joy, all of that. Then looking at it of like, how can you start to simultaneously? Because I believe that two things need each other to form a whole yin and yang day and night light and dark. Just as we start to bring in more of what we want in our life, we have to simultaneously rid ourselves of stuff that is no longer supporting us. Yes. No, from that list. And that awareness, how can you start to release? Things in your life that are no longer supporting your ultimate quote unquote heart centered foundation or success or goal. And then how do you like not just create the awareness around it, but then how do you create an actionable plan? What are you going to start doing today? You're going to start doing next week. What are you going to have done by this next month so that every day you're chucking away very smallly at this thing so that when you have this conversation 30 days later, it is remarkable how quickly we start to remove stuff out of our lives that don't support us once we realize it. Simultaneously, we do the same thing. Like if you realize, I just, I geek out about this whole thing because it's like, every time I do it, I'm reconnected back to my why, like I'm reconnected back to my definition of success. Like I do this for myself every single quarter in my life, just to make sure that like my boat is rocking in the way that is most effective. Um, So it's like, if you discover through this, that like, you absolutely value like family dinners, I'm just using this example. Like you value family dinners at the table where like, it's really intentional conversations, but yet you've realized in your life that like that dinner, like everyone's eating fast food or just picking something out of the fridge. And like, no one's sitting down and having a conversation. It's like simultaneously, what you're going to release is like. The unhealthy foods in your house, the like accessibility to fast foods, but then what you're going to start implementing our family dinners, a meal time, having a family meal calendar. So like create, don't just create the awareness, but like the bridge, the gap between where we're at in our dream life and where we want to go is action. So the more that you can get yourself into a place of action, the more attainable. You're going to be in this dream life is going to be, and then you'll be like your client who two years later is living her definition of success. Yeah. And it's so funny because one big goal that a lot of people have, like, especially in our big program. So breakthrough, the whole intention of the program is to be what we love to say, work optional or removable CEO. So to be at a point in the business where you're not in the weeds. Right. And one thing I sometimes encourage and I'm like, this is ballsy, but do it anyways, because I promise you won't regret it is like book a vacation. Like six months from now, just three days, like in the three days cannot be the weekend. I have very strict rules about this. It can not be the weekend. That's cheating. Cause two of those days are on the weekend. We're talking like three days in the middle of the week, like intentional time that you will not touch your computer, whether it's going somewhere, you just stay home, whatever that looks like. And this just made me think of the connection of what you were just talking about, because in order to get there, if I know that in six months. I've got a three day vacation and I'm strapped to my computer for 20 percent I got payroll for clients. I've got this and I've got that. You bet your sweet ass for six months, I am going to work so hard to make sure to have all the SOPs, the right system, because I'm anticipating that's my end goal. So like you said, it's like, it's like the current Z. So if the current Z is like, I want to have three days off, fully unplugged, never have to touch my computer. I'm like, okay. Then what do we do have to do at point A? So let's work backwards. So it's the backwards, the domino effect. Like once you do one thing, it all kind of ripples. It's let's get the SOP, let's hire the team, let's do this or whatever that looks like. And so I really liked that. I always like to reconnect for like the people who are like me who are like the business people, but at the same time, it all goes back to you as an individual. And I'll just share this with you, but I got back from Austin. I went for an event out there with one of my coaches from my other company. And it was literally, like, I almost, like, pulled out of going because I just was so tired. I had told you guys I had been traveling a lot, I'm just, like, exhausted. And I just, like, have had so much business strategy, I'm like, I don't want strategy, I just want to, like, chill out. I went to this event and it was the most transformational thing because she brought in these, like, amazing people. I'm sitting there ready with my notebook talking about strategy, like, some things I wanted to kind of cover. Even though I'm resisting it, I'm like, I'm going to do it since I'm here, right? She was like, okay, today we're doing breathwork. We're breathwork. We're going to bring this guy, his name was Samson in to help you reconnect to your inner self. I've actually never done breathwork like what they did. I swear to you, I was like under, I don't even know if that's the right word to use, but like under for like two hours. And as soon as I felt like my body was just like, in a peaceful state when you're doing like the breath work. I lost it as far as like cried my heart out. I like experienced things about like my old self. I literally thought I was going to like things that were going to come up or business stuff because I have been, you know, everybody's stressed about their business. It's just as your business grows, it's just different forms of it. And I just remember getting up from that and just being like I have so much more clarity like and had nothing, nothing to do with the business. It all had to go back to you. A trigger moment when my brother, this is like so TMI, but in such a good way. My brother passed away from cancer when I was 15, he was 16. And my mom, the moment that came up to me during that somatic breathwork session was the moment my mom called me on the phone and I'm a five kids. And she called and said, I need you to put on a brave face. And I need you to get everybody together and today's the day for your brother. And I didn't realize how much her asking me to be brave in that moment, just like to be there, actually messed with me for the rest of my life. I'm getting chills just because like this just happened like a week ago. Yeah, it's just so crazy because I know so many people that I've even shared that story with since the week of just being back from Austin. The reason I want to share that is because if I didn't do the internal work, even though I went thinking it's about business, which every time anybody listens to this, Alyssa, give me strategy. I bet you the most transformational things you can do are the things that are inside and just having the awareness that I really struggle with, asking people for help because I was told, be brave, do it. You have to be strong. You have to stand up. You have to be the one to lead everyone. Do not cry. I took that to heart. So I don't ask for help. I have a hard time. I don't do these things. I don't get support. Having that realization, the awareness, my point a, that there's a problem here. I now can do some work to say, wow, this really makes sense. Why in my business? It was so hard for me to hire a personal assistant because I didn't want to burden someone else. Cause I had to be brave to take on that capacity. And, And it just was such a, it was a beautiful, very beautiful moment. So I share that with you because I think that what you're doing is more impactful than you, you probably already recognize it, but probably more than, you know, this little moment with that man and that experience that my coach. Put together for us will probably like save me for quite some time in my life or like where I need to go with direction. I mean, I just, I feel you on so many levels and got chills as well, because what you just shared is a testament to the power of personal development, personal growth, self work, whatever title you want to title it. It's like so many times when we're like, It's like, Oh, well, that's not for me. Oh, well, I just need to focus on my business. I just need the right funnel strategy. I just need the right tagline. I just, it's like, we think that we need this really specific thing, but the truth is what we most of the time need is to get out of our own way, but we didn't know we were in our own way because we hadn't done the work to like, realize that, and it's so important that we date ourselves, that we really commit to working through these emotions, these physical feelings, these like things that come up that we think are just business related, but are so much deeper. And as we move through them, not only do we grow. Not only do we expand, but so to then does our business. I'm reading a book right now. I think you would really enjoy it. It's called the code of the extraordinary mind, the author's vision. I don't remember his last name. And it is so remarkable. He's like, A genius. He's the founder of a company called Mindvalley, and it's all accessibility to personal growth and personal development, but like, he's like on Richard Branson's private island and like, you know, he's like in, in deep with these like big guys, and he shares a lot. So many stories in there of like people going to Richard Branson's house and wanting to like have business conversations. And he's over here being like, let's dance on the table. Like, let's go sit in the jacuzzi. Let's go under the palm tree. Because it's like, What we really need a lot of times is to just allow ourselves to have fun, to allow ourselves to date ourselves, to allow ourselves to remember what it's like to do these things that like we really enjoy and fill up our cup and like whatever that thing is for you. And so I just, I'm being called one, the book's remarkable. I feel like your community would really enjoy it too, though. I think what you just shared was like, And it all circles back to where this conversation started of taking that first step. Like you didn't want to go to that conference, something still told you, even in the exhaust show up. So it's like you right there made a conscious choice to listen to whatever that thing was that was stirring in you that said to show up. And then look at how quickly in a week your life has already transformed because you took that one step to step a. Yeah. So the invitation is if there's any time that you get that nudge, that you feel that calling that you're gravitating towards that thing, do yourself the honor and trust yourself to just go into that curiosity. You're not going to know step Z by step A, but you'll damn well be way closer to step Z. If you take step A. Yeah. If someone would have told me a part of my path was to like, do this at this retreat one, as soon as she was like, we're going to do breath work. I was like, no, I'm not. I'm not doing it. I'm stuck in Austin. So I'm doing it. But like, I will lean into things. Cause I'll always try everything I've done breath work before, but nothing like that. That was just like very much expansive. But yeah. I always tell people like I've avoided, I can't tell you for how long, my issues, my things, the things that I knew I needed to work on, but I swear every time I've uncovered like one extra layer, it's allowed me to be a better leader. It's allowed me to be a better supporter. Also, it's so funny because me and you talked, I believe before I went to Austin, And in my brain, I was like, Oh, it'd be cool if we kind of like did the podcast before. And I think that the universe also set up our conversation very strategically. Also for myself in some weird, odd way. And it was just so, yeah, it's just, it was crazy. And like the whole session was just transformational and just, Just the whole message I want to say to anybody, and I know that you're saying this loud and clear is you have to pour into your own cup or you cannot overfill to serve your clients. Like you running payroll every single Monday and having to always be there and like literally like just drowning yourself in like 60 hours, which a lot of my listeners are in that, space, it's not doing you any good. Yes, you've got clients that are pre obligations, but the worst that you can do is say, I can't deliver on my service. Like, I want to be really honest with you. I'm struggling because I bet you that other business owner who's listening to it, who heard you say, I'm really struggling right now might say, man, do I get what you're going through? It's chill. Like I don't need you to do the cleanup right away. And I think that that just, you know, Is here to remind people that like if you guys have a story Or you need the space to just say how you feel or that you've been neglecting yourself One y'all know how to get ahold of me. But also that's what ashley's for That's what this this support is and i'm so grateful. I brought you on here to have these conversations because like I can't help everyone and everything. This is why I bring experts. Like, you know what I mean, bring them into your world. Yeah. Well, and what I just, like, heard and I, I, I sound very, very hippie when I say this, but, like, in community, we find belonging. It's shared experiences and connection. Like we feel seen and heard and what that does for ourselves and ultimately our lives is transformative. So like us literally just first being honest with ourselves, but then being honest with the outside world, it takes down that barrier. It takes down that wall and it brings us back into this human experience and connection that I know regardless of what industry you're in. Every single human being is wired for connection and belonging. It's like why Brene Brown is who she is and does the work that she does is because she's literally spent her life studying belonging because every single one of us want it. So it's like, No, even though entrepreneurship can feel lonely, you are not alone. And that is why programs like yours are so remarkable. It's why podcasts are amazing because you can at least like sit in a room with someone without having to sit in the room with them. So yeah. Yeah. I love that. I just think this is a great, like I said, I don't know what it was, the universe, like somehow told you to wait to book it. And then that's perfect because it worked out for me and you. So. And also, like, I actually have an episode that's probably going to air before this one does that's actually sharing, I did a, through that session, which was still very transformational at the very end, she had us do writing a eulogy to ourselves. you don't know what that is, because if you're like me, I forgot what that was. A eulogy is essentially like if you were talking at your own funeral to yourself or to someone else. So we did like a. You know, thank you for serving me at the capacity that you did, but you no longer serve me, you're no longer here, you're, you know, all that stuff. Then what she did, one, I did not know this, if she would have told us that we were going to read it in front of everybody, I probably would have written it different. So I'm really grateful that she didn't because I feel like I was way more real and raw because I, I didn't know that people were going to read it. She had us say it. And there was only three of us at the retreat, the women that were like participating. So it was a very intimate thing. cried all day. We were all just like, I was exhausted like that day. And so we read our eulogy. And then after she said, okay, I want you to write talking to your future self of who you are. And it was so beautiful. So like, I plan to have an episode where I'm actually going to share my Eulogy, which is so like raw and so deep and also share the outcome of what I said now I'm gonna be like who I'm gonna be here and you talked about this several times about your future self and I think it is so key to work on like Your future self because whatever you've said in your mind or someone else told you or your parents told you or well My parents always were really strict of money. So that's how I am. Like It's all BS, like you don't have to be what you were yesterday. And I think that that's what your message is here. And I love that so much. I mean, I, yeah, I, I couldn't resonate with you any more than what you're saying. And I think that it just, I'm like vividly thinking of one of my clients that I was working with. And there was a point when we first started, she's like, well, I need to know what to do with my business. And I need to know what type of programs I'm going to do. And I need to know, and I need to know, how am I going to actually do all this? And then we entertain that for like the first three sessions. And there was a point where I just looked at her and I said her name and I was like, what do you really want? Like when no one is looking, when you are sitting in your room, when you're journaling, when you're singing naked in front of the mirror, whatever that thing is that is so you that the rest of the world doesn't know about what, what does your heart really want? And she kind of looked at me with like such big eyes. And she goes, but it's not what society wants or expects of me. And I'm like, but that is like that's the problem. That is the problem is so many of us live our lives based on what we think we should be doing and what we are supposed to do and what we think our parents want of us to do and what we think our partner loves us for. When in reality. If we just slowed down and listened to what our heart is really wanting and asking, how much more aligned and dream fulfilled and dynamic each of our lives will be. Like, so give yourself, I love that you're going to share this because that's going to open up. It's the, like, that will open up the vessel for someone else to acknowledge that part of them and then be that much more vulnerable out in the world. So if I could like sum up what we have like talked about today, you have. And I'm talking to every single person listening right now. You have everything that you need and you to move through this life and you're like highest, most aligned, intentional, vibrant expression of whatever that looks like. The truth is, is we are carrying heavy backpacks and wearing so many layers. And as we do this work, As we like love on ourselves, as we go to these conferences, as we join these like programs, as we do these things, it's like a layer is shed a rock's taken out of the backpack, a layer shed and a rock is taken out of the backpack. And as you do that, you start to tap into these things that were innately in you are so remarkable and that are so inspiring. And that only you possess. Like a truly only you have the exact gifts within you. We all have commonalities. We all have similarities, but like you are the only, you just like, there's no, you know, there's no two fingerprints that are the same. Yeah. You know, like we are like that in this human experience. So just love on yourself, give yourself the grace and space. And know that like, you're capable of anything, anything. Yeah. I love that. Words of encouragement. I'm just gonna re listen to that every day. Have my, my daily wake up with Ashley. Your alarm clocks. It's gonna be my alarm clock. I need to like, Don't even think about that. That'd be actually really fun here. It's like, yes, the passion. I'm all like waking up like Tony Robbins, just like so excited for everything. I love that. I think this is so perfect conversation. I think right now it's heavy. It's an election year. Our industry, our clients, a lot of people in general are just like, everything feels so weighted and so heavy. So I really love this conversation. And so I would love for people to continue it with you and get immersed in your world with whatever you got going on. I know you've got some special stuff coming up. So I'm going to just give you a moment to just let everyone know. How can they connect with you, get into your world, learn all the things, Ashley? Thank you. Something fun that's happening right now is I'm writing my first book. So I literally. Just last week got the like design of the cover this morning. I submitted to my top publishers. So that is coming underway and happening right now before that comes out into the world, cause it's going to be a bit because publishing takes a very, it takes much longer than I ever understood. two of the best ways to connect are actually three. One, I've got a podcast living in intentional life podcast. It's on all places you find your podcast. The second thing is I'm an Instagram girl. I love Instagram. So you can find me at Ashley strong Smith underscore. I share all kinds of inspiration, motivation. I also geek out because I'm in nature and live in the mountains and I'm obsessed with it. So that's always in my feed. And the third thing though, that I actually wanted to share is what I just shared about creating a heart centered foundation. Is I've got a free workbook, so I'm sure you can link that in the show notes. But anyone who wants to walk through that exercise themselves, I literally have created an 18 page workbook that you can self guide yourself to really find that clarity. And I'm always like, do this monthly, do this quarterly, at least do it twice a year, because it's remarkable how having a tool like this can really bring you back to your center and equilibrium. I love it. Well, thank you so much for being here today. This is. So amazing. And I can't wait for the whole world to hear it. And thank you so much for being here today. Thank you. I'm so grateful.